J Dawgs

J Dawgs on Foodio54

J Dawgs on a sunny September Day

**DISCLAIMER***

It had to happen at some point.  After over 50 reviews in the Salt Lake Valley, eventually I was going to have to make it to “The other valley” down South.  However, the reason I want to state this disclaimer now, is not being from this state originally, I never really grew up with any BYU or U of U allegience.  Since this is my first trip down to Provo, I really find it necessary to have a little fun with the Cougars, so if you are a BYU fan, bear with me on this.  There were several key giveaways that I was in Provo on my first visit to J Dawgs.  First the obvious giveaway was all the Cougar paraphenelia everywhere we went.  The blue shirts dominated every other color.  I noticed in the Fanzz store later that afternoon, that there was maybe 3 or 4 Utah shirts compared to everything else BYU.  Key sign #2 was there were actually more receding hairlines at J Dawgs then there were actual menu items.  I’ll get to the simplicity of the menu later on in the review.  And finally the #3 sign that I was in Provo, was getting hit with the pseudo swears in the parking lot.  You may ask “What is a pseudo swear?”  Basically it is saying a cuss word without actually saying a cuss word.  There was a young male co-ed that threw a dirty shirt or towel or something at a female co-ed getting out of her car.  The female co-ed got upset at the boy and what did she call him?  (Wait for it.)   (Waaaaaiiiiiittttt   for ittttttt) .  A butt-hole.  Yes that is right, a butt-hole.  I mean who says that?  Who calls anyone anymore a butt-hole?  At the very least they could of said “A-hole” if they didn’t want to go all the way and say A$$ Hole, but butt-hole was pretty toned down.   GOT DANDRUFF SOME OF IT ITCHES, it’s time to get this dang  J-Dawg review on the way.  (Let’s see how many pseudo swears I can come up with.)  This will be a fun game.

The J Dawgs kitchen

I walked into J Dawgs, and let me tell you, it did not look like a restaurant at all.  There were no menus, no prices, just a grill behind the cash register and a lady taking orders.  My wife and I told her that this was our first time there.  That gal said “We have quarter pound all beef dogs, or polish dogs that are a little spicier” .  I was waiting for something else after that, but that was pretty much it.  No milkshakes, no fries, no hamburgers, no frills.  Just straight up hot dogs and polish dogs on fresh buns.  That is what they do.  Oh FETCH, I almost forgot.  (see what I did there?)  They have fixings they will put on your dog like their “Special Sauce”.  I’ve learned in my old age, that when a place sells “Special Sauce” to just get it.  The 15-20 dogs that were sold before we walked in, every single person ordered their dog with “Special Sauce” so there was no way I was going to be the weirdo and not get the DARN sauce.  (I did it again)

3 J Dawg quarter pound wieners with special sauce

Here we have the end aluminum foil wrapped product.  You have 3 huge hot dogs smothered in special sauce.  Not pictured here is my Polish sausage that I had them add special sauce, homemade kraut, and onions to.  Oh and is that a little mayo on the side of that J Dawg, or are you happy to see me?  Son of a biscuit!  Sure is!

The menu

Remember when I said there was no menu?  Well I lied.  I found it later during my trip.  It was in the.  *cough  hold on.  Earmuffs please!   (it was next to where you take a *gulp  CRAP)  Yes that is right, the menu was in the restroom.  This really goes to show just how straight forward the menu really was.  All the guess-work is taken out for you.  Maybe that is how they are able to get through so many starving students so quickly.

An interesting mural in the back

There was this mural in the back that I found interesting.  You can see the hot dog that man is holding up has X’s in it.  That is the J Dawg trade mark, they make chop lines in the dog before grilling them.  Also it appears to have some sort of Asian motiff to the painting.  Maybe that is why the special sauce it basically a Teriyaki sauce.  The sauce was super sticky and sweet but delicious.

Best Soda Fountain I’ve ever seen.

Look at how awesome the selection of soda is here!  For starters they have Apple Beer on tap, which is a major plus.  But they give you not one, not two, but FREAKING three Diet soda choices!  Diet Mt. Dew, Diet Dr. Pepper, and Diet Pepsi.  Plus they have Squirt and 7-UP.

So I guess I haven’t mentioned something important yet as we close out this review.  The hot dogs here were absolutely amazing!  We didn’t see any menu prices, but we bought 4 hot dogs, 1 polish dog, and 2 sodas, and the total was just right at $20.  That means each dog was around $3 and some change.  The dogs were huge, and grilled just right.  The special sauce that J Dawgs provides is finger licking good.  I even got some of the sauce on my table, and I couldn’t wipe it up with a napkin because it was so thick and gooey.  That is what you will be dealing with here.  So Utes listen up!  J Dawgs is legit!  It is okay to get this close to the BYU campus, I just don’t know if you should wear your red Ute gear down here.  And don’t forget your earmuffs just in case some inappropriate language like “Butt-hole” goes flying around.  SHOOT, DARN, DANG, BISCUIT, FREAK  I love this place!

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